"Tiki Moon" drabbles by Christopher

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 71

Tiki Moon #71

I looked out at the horizon. It's a bit disconcerting when you spin 360 degrees and see nothing but water. The only other time I'd been on a big boat was when Uncle Sam sent me on that vacation to Normandy. Only I didn't notice the sights that day. Kind of had something else on my mind.

The wind was blowing pretty hard, and Deborah had to keep grabbing the top of her hat to stop it from sailing out into the Pacific Ocean.

"Now, I'll answer any and all questions that you have, Mr. Randolph."

"Jake," I said, smiling...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 70

Tiki Moon #70

She was wearing a pair of white slacks that clung tightly to the lower half of her body. I didn't blame them. She grabbed a white sun hat and pulled it over her head and we exited the room and made our way to the deck.

There were people swarming all over the place. A couple was playing shuffleboard while two kids ran around them screaming. There was a couple holding hands and walking around like they were the only two people there.

We found a piece of railing toward the stern that was vacant so we staked a claim...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 69

Tiki Moon #69

That hit me like a speeding bullet. How could she know who I was? Was I being set up? Then it dawned on me. Although she'd obviously tried to conceal her voice on the phone, I realized this was the chickie that called me at my office.

"So," I said, "how's your...boss?"

"Trying to kill me. But of course you know that, don't you, Mr. Randolph?"

"Only because you deceived me into getting involved in this bullshit."

"I apologize, Mr. Randolph. Let's get out on deck and I'll explain it all to you."

I smiled and rose from my seat...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 68

Tiki Moon #68

"Can I help you?" she asked, a hint of irritation starting to emerge in her voice.

"Ms. Newstead, may I speak with you a moment?" I asked.

She nodded and beckoned me into her cabin. It was massive. Apparently there were different sized cabins. The next time I saw Mort Alexander I fully intended to punch him in the face.

She directed me to a chair under the porthole. I sat down as she went back to applying her makeup, which she didn't even need.

"Now, Ms. Newstead, my name is..."

"Jake Randolph," she said as she applied her lipstick...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 67

Tiki Moon #67

I knocked on the door of Cabin 115. There was muffled movement inside. I heard a voice call out, "Just a minute!"

After a few more seconds the door opened. She was more stunning in person than in her photograph. She certainly didn't look 45. Her hair was dark brown, parted in the middle and flowing down over her shoulders almost to her breasts, which were quite ample. Her blouse had the first three buttons undone and she was displaying some cleavage that made me wish I'd packed climbing gear.

Her mysterious hazel green eyes stared back at me intently...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 66

Tiki Moon #66

We walked over to a podium and she picked up a clipboard.

"What's her name, sir?"

"Newstead. Deborah Newstead. Prettiest cheerleader at North Dallas High!"

She smiled as she went down the list.

"Here she is. Cabin 115."

"Ain't that a coincidence? 115 is my lucky number!" I said loudly.

She giggled again and put the clipboard back down.

"Well, ma'am, I thank you kindly. And if you're ever in the Dallas area look me up and I just might give you an oil well!"

She laughed and said, "You're quite welcome, sir."

I turned and headed for Cabin 115...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 65

Tiki Moon #65

Some might have thought that was overkill, but I've found that just walking up to people and asking them questions typically doesn't get you anywhere. But if you do it in a larger than life way they get so caught up in it that they usually wind up helping you before they've even realized it. Which is exactly what this chickie was doing.

"So, if you could see your way to helping me find her cabin I'd be much obliged, sweetheart. I've really got an itchin' to see this woman."

"Well," she said, "let's get the passenger list and see."

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 64

Tiki Moon #64

She smiled widely, "I'll certainly try, sir!"

I smiled back, "Well, ain't you the sweetest thing that ever drowned a plate of pancakes! Well, I understand there's a filly on this here ocean liner that I used to corral back in my stable boy days, if you get my meaning, ma'am," I said as I elbowed her several times and smiled widely.

She smiled back, "Yes, sir, I do!"

"Well, now she told me what her cabin number was, but I'm afraid my memory is about as useful as a washing machine in a nudist colony!"

She giggled and blushed...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 63

Tiki Moon #63

My first job was to track down someone on the crew to see if they could tell me what cabin Ms. Newstead was in. I found a lovely young girl in a uniform and stopped her.

"Yes, sir?" she said with a squeaky little voice.

I put on my best Texas oil man accent. "Hello, sweetheart. My name is Jacob Randall from Dallas, the big D, ma'am. Texas. I'm in oil on a good day, but right now I'm in a bit of hot water, honey child! I wonder if'n you could do me a grett big favor, sweetie pie."

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 62

Tiki Moon #62

The first port of call was Honolulu on the island of Hawaii. I'd always wanted to see it. I hoped I'd have enough time to pay my respects at Pearl Harbor. Then it was on to Yokohama, Japan, followed by Kowloon, Hong Kong and finally Manila in the Philippines. It sounded exhausting. People do this for relaxation?

I'd been studying the throng of people on the ship, looking for Ms. Newstead. I'd seen young couples, old couples, singles, kids and crew. But no Ms. Newstead.

If she wasn't here I was going to have quite a swim back to L.A....

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 61

Tiki Moon #61

To say I was living in the lap of luxury would be inaccurate. Okay, it would be a downright lie. This thing was like a prison cell. I barely had room to turn around. If there were better cabins than this and Morty had me put in this one to save a few bucks I was going to wring his neck.

I got things squared away as best as I could, and then stretched out on the bed to look at the itinerary. Well, I didn't exactly stretch out. It was a bit more like cramming myself into a coffin...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 60

Tiki Moon #60

I boarded the SS Angelina at the Port of Los Angeles at noon on Monday. I was anxious to find Ms. Newstead and get this mess sorted out. The ocean liner and the dock was packed with people, all waving like idiots at one another.

The ship was massive. I hadn't been on a barge like this since my little vacation to Normandy in June of '44. I was hoping there would be less shooting this time.

We finally set sail, and I waited up on deck until we'd left port and then went to get settled in my cabin....

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 59

Tiki Moon #59

"And he did migrate from the Chicago area. You might check with the authorities there and see if there are any outstanding warrants on him before you set up a meeting," I said.

Harrigan shook his head, "I know how to do my job, Jake."

I smiled, "I know. Anyway, I'll see you in a few weeks."

I got up to leave and Harrigan quickly asked, "Wait, where are you going?"

"A cruise to the Orient. I leave on Monday."

Harrigan laughed loudly, "You just made my day, Randolph. I was always hoping you'd take a slow boat to China!"

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 58

Tiki Moon #58

"And where did you get this information?" Harrigan asked, still grinning.

"From someone who wasn't just whistling Dixie," I said as I pulled a piece of paper out of my jacket with the instructions on it that I had written down before I left my apartment.

Harrigan read it, shaking his head. "What kind of moron is this?"

"A busy one," I said. "I know you probably don't have any evidence to tie him to a crime, but at least you can set up a meeting and get a look at him."

Harrigan nodded, "This should be very handy, Randolph."

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 57

Tiki Moon #57

I'd just finished packing my suitcase when Nancy called me back and told me that Harrigan had returned to the precinct. I thanked her and quickly made my way there before he could buzz off again.

I found Harrigan sitting at his desk doing some paperwork. He looked tired, so I decided to just play it straight with him.

He looked up at me and grunted.

"What now?" he asked as he looked back at his papers.

"I know how to get in touch with Mr. Saint," I said as I sat down across from Harrigan.

Harrigan looked up, grinning...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 56

Tiki Moon #56

I went to my office and looked up the number for the Pacifica Cruise Lines. I called and asked if they had a reservation for Jacob Randall. Mort Alexander must've been eager. He'd already booked it. The ship was leaving port on Monday afternoon. Which meant I had the weekend to pack and get things in order.

I called up Harrigan's precinct but he wasn't in. I wanted to let him know how to arrange a meeting with Mr. Saint. I asked Nancy, the switchboard operator, to let me know as soon as Harrigan got back. She said she would...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 55

Tiki Moon #55

"Thanks, Eddie. Needless to say, I'd rather no one know I was inquiring about Mr. Saint," I said as I left his office and went back into the flower shop. Aristotle was still sitting there looking at his girlie magazine and puffing away on a cigarette.

"D'ya get your info, Randolph?" Ari asked through a haze of smoke.

I nodded and walked to the door, then turned back and smiled, "You know those cigarettes will stunt your growth, don't you?"

He pulled the cigarette from his mouth, looked at it and then smiled back at me, "Now you tell me!"

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 54

Tiki Moon #54

You had to carry to the meeting place a copy of that day's Los Angeles Times turned to the sports section. It all seemed very cloak-and-dagger but I suppose that's how the guy stayed one step ahead of the cops. But he wouldn't for long. I was going to give this information to Harrigan. He wouldn't be able to pick him up without evidence to tie him to any of the contract hits, but they could set up a meeting with him and at least be able to get a look at him and have someone tail him...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 53

Tiki Moon #53

Eddie explained the whole process to me. You had to put an ad in the personal column of the Los Angeles Times headed "Looking For Love."

The ad had to read:

Man of considerable means seeks female companion. Must be at least 25 years old and ready to travel the world and be lavished with money and gifts. Contact box 3745 c/o LAT.

And then, amongst all the greedy women inundating you with pledges of true love and devotion, you would find this small response:

Sounds promising. Meet me at.......

And then a place, date and time would be given...

Jake Randolph in "Tiki Moon" Pt. 52

Tiki Moon #52

I nodded, "I can see now why he migrated to the west coast."

"Yeah. Anyways, he's already done several hits out here."

"So, do you know who any of his victims were?" I asked as I lit a cigarette.

He shook his head, "I know a lot of things, Randolph, but even I can't keep up with every schmuck in L.A. that gets whacked or who wanted it done."

"Okay, one more question. Do you have any idea how a potential client might get in touch with him?"

Eddie looked up and grinned, "How's your love life been lately, Randolph?"