'Welcome to the meeting of the Skaggerston town council, gentlemen' said the mayor, sucking on a sherbet dip. 'What's the first item of business?'
'I think we need to discuss the playground allocation' said one of the ministers.
'I've drawn a pretty picture of the bestest playground ever' said another, brandishing a pencil-crayon sketch of a climbing frame.
'Where's the football pitch?' asked the Mayor, distraught.
'Durr! It's there, dummy!' said the minister, jabbing at a patch of green.
'I've got a splinter' cried another minister. 'Look! Look!'
The Mayor had an urge to play a game of tag.