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...never cut off an 18-wheeler on the interstate.

Addendum 1: get checked for whiplash.
Addendum 2: get back of car repaired.

...if the wife ever asks again if those jeans make her butt look big the answer's NO!

...next time you call the boss a "dickhead" make sure he isn't standing behind you.

...always remember "one drink" to your best friend Billy means you wake up three days later in the alley behind the strip club missing your wallet, your shoes and your dignity.

...flush the dead goldfish before your daughter gets home and tell her he ran away.

16 comments add one below

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    Hopefully the drought is lifted. That's my first drabble in 3 months.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 11 months ago

    Hehe! Excellent tips! Glad you’re back in the saddle, Christopher. As Chairman Mao once said, ‘Every journey starts with a single drabble.’ I look forward to the next ones...

  • avatar

    Frenchie 11 months ago

    Oh, oh, all these notes to self are important but -
    you are right, if you value your life 🤣, never forget Number 2. That's a big NO,NO, and number 5 if you do not want to fork out for two expensive ''guilt'' presents.
    (one for daughter for having left the dead goldfish in the bowl, and one for wife who will take this excuse to berate for your insensitivity, but in fact, not having forgiven your honesty of number 2)
    Trust me!
    Glad you are back and thank you for the morning laugh.

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    Thanks, Neville and Frenchy. I might turn this into a series.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 11 months ago

    Yes, Christopher, a series would be an excellent idea! I’m looking for a new series to write myself, but am stalled right now and just doing a ‘series’ of one-offs!🥴

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    Yeah, a series does tend to help spur creativity. At least it does for me. I need to revive some of my older ones like Hard Of Herring or Berserko The Clown.

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    And I haven't done a sponsor drabble in a long time, but satirizing things has gotten difficult considering how bizarre real life is now. I read a headline sometimes and I'm sure it's the Babylon Bee or some other satirical website and then I find out it's from CNN or Reuters or something.

  • avatar

    Frenchie 11 months ago

    Same here! I want something both funny and smart, lol.
    and am I worried about being politically incorrect? no of course, but it seems to me that nowadays, if called my cat a tabby, which she is, she might sue me for not calling her a feline instead and that by calling her a tabby, I have infringed her cat rights and caused her uneccessary stress.🤣

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    Hehe! Everyone else gets offended over the slightest thing, your cat may as well join in the fun too!

  • avatar

    Frenchie 11 months ago

    hehehe, LOL

  • avatar

    Jamie Clapperton 11 months ago

    Tell you what Christopher , I'm haunted by the irrational notion that the only things stopping me from cutting off an 18 wheeler on an interstate highway are my non driver status and the fact that none of the roads where I'm from are interstate.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 11 months ago

    Around here Jamie they’re not interstate either... they’re just in a state! A right state, with massive potholes all over the place!😤

  • avatar

    Jamie Clapperton 11 months ago

    Thats' bad. :-)

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    I tend to forget that most on here are either in the UK or Europe. I don't think you even call them 18-wheelers. The phrase I always heard on British TV shows was "articulated lorry."

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 11 months ago

    Articulated lorries! Now that’s a term I recognise, Christopher! Or even ‘artics’.

  • avatar

    Christopher 11 months ago

    I bet it's hard to drive an 18-wheeler in the Artic! Or is that the Antartic?

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