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Obituaries #3


Fred Johnson was laid to rest this morning at the Dirtnap Cemetery in downtown Milwaukee. Johnson drowned last week, falling into a vat of beer at the Pyst Brewery where he'd been employed for 23 years.

Fred is survived by his wife Helen, 13 Chihuahuas and a parrot named Bruce.

Friends described Johnson as gregarious, a top-notch bowler and a budding philatelist.

The circumstances behind Johnson's drowning remain sketchy. The official word was that he drowned before anyone knew he'd fallen, but more than one co-worker said Johnson left the vat at least twice to take a leak.

4 comments add one below

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt over 2 years ago

    Great joke, brilliantly told. I knew it, but couldn’t remember the ending until, well, the ending! My attention had been hijacked by those chihuahuas and Bruce! More like this please, Christopher!

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    Neville Hunt over 2 years ago

    Re-reading, seeing that it was based in Milwaukee, I wonder that Fred didn’t do more than just take a couple of leaks, ‘cos I reckon he might have had the Schlitz too!

  • avatar

    Christopher over 2 years ago

    Haha! Yeah, I wrote this last night before bed (actually IN bed) and I forgot to mention it was based on an old joke. The parrot named Bruce sounded like something Monty Python would've said if they were doing this. And Pyst Beer is one of my old sponsor drabbles so I thought I'd just use it instead of a real beer. Thanks for reading.

  • avatar

    VerityAlways over 2 years ago

    Thanks for the chuckle, Christopher!

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