Not Karen For This Pandemic

So this morbidly obese bitch yells at me in a store today because I wasn't wearing a mask. Here was the conversation:

"You should respect people around you! I don't want to get sick and die!"

"Really? Then why don't you lose some weight? You're on the shortlist for an early death, toots, and a pandemic has nothing to do with it!"

"What? How dare you!"

"No, really. The only virus you're suffering from is an advanced case of spoon-in-mouth disease! And if you keep sticking that bulbous nose where it doesn't belong you may die by homicide!"