"Glastonbury 2017" drabbles by Neville Hunt

He be B G

Glastonbury 2017 #3

Reduced to just a third over time, oh brother, he still hit the heights and found the sounds of his homophonitials.

Over and over, he hit us with hit upon hit, for this was the 'legend' slot.

When reminded of one after another work of brilliance, you realise how much that great triple talent pool has leaked. Tragedy! But as long as there's a stage, long may the sole survivor keep stayin' alive, stayin' alive... ah, ah, ah, ah.

Ask the thousands present to love somebody, then the last pro bro would have been first in line.

The legendary B.G.

Killed!

Glastonbury 2017 #2

Eyes Peeled! Surprise, surprise. Who would it be?

Ready... for the set... and go!

This was no mere floral tribute. Flowers on stage though for the entire performance. The crowd sang every word of every song. The noisiest of the weekend, reports said.

They didn't live down to their name. Their weapons weren't firearms, knives or garrotes, although there were strings attached.

The language as clean cut as Flowers. Lyrics you could almost sing to your granny. You wouldn't mention their name though, lest she called the cops.

Finally, looking on the bright side, the audience loved them to death.

Food!

Glastonbury 2017 #1

The drummer straight out of Sesame Street, language straight out of the gutter and the crowd completely out of their heads. The lights flared as brightly as the drummer's flashing teeth as song after song was banged out by the headliners.

Thousands crowded round the Pyramid Stage knew every word of every song, in case the lead singer forgot. He didn't. Nor extra words of Anglo Saxon origin as he insulted members of the audience.

The crowd obediently filled the gaps when the singer could no longer be arsed to sing himself.

At Glastonbury 2017, the Foos had been lit.