Martians stole my bike at school.
I tried to tell my mom, but she thought I was lying.
I tried to tell my dad, but the minute I said “flying saucer,” he stopped listening.
So I knew I had to handle things myself. The next time I saw their ship rumble overhead, I whipped out my laser pointer and pointed it at the spot I expected the pilot’s eyes to be. “Pew pew!”
It worked! The UFO crashed.
Turns out it was just the repo guy. I was parked illegally, and apparently our local collection agency doesn’t discriminate against Martians.