Starter for 1 (million)

“What I want, Amy, is one million pounds.”

“No bloody way! You’re having a laugh, Rufus!”

“Hear me out, Amy. What you will get is the following....”

Rufus ran through what The Goss would get for its money.

“The full story. Murder, rape, mutilation, cannibalism, burglary, torture, patricide, gay sex, kidnapping, imprisonment, escape, police ineptitude, MI6 recruitment, MI6 spooks, giving the police and MI6 the runaround, amnesia, groundbreaking technology breakthrough, loyalty, generosity and reincarnation, twice!

And, importantly, the loss of the loves of my life, my son and his mum. How’s that for a million quidsworth?”

“I’ll call the boss!”