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To say Jim was a gadget freak was an understatement. On Monday he bought an iPad, Tuesday an iPhone, Wednesday an iPod, Thursday a MacBook. It was on Friday when he returned home with another iPad that his wife finally snapped.

“Jim!” she shrieked. “We cannot afford these luxuries day after day after day!”

The problem was Jim was a proverb-loving hypochondriac.

“But an apple a day keeps the doctor away,” Jim explained.

“Jesus, Jim, there’s a cheaper way to fulfil that proverb, you know!”

“But peeling them is such a fag and bits get stuck in my teeth.”

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