Cancer news

"I have some news concerning your tests."

Janine sat down nervously in front of the specialist.

"You have a metastisized benevolent cancer."

The words metastisized, and cancer, rang around her mind. Ringing back and forth like the peal of a bell. She started crying.

"Please! Janine, calm down..."

"How... How long do I have?"

"Well... That's just it. Barring serious injury, you've got forever."

"What? What are you saying?"

"It's, er, a benevolent tumour. I've never seen anything like it before, but basically as it spread throughout your body, it's changed your DNA. You're effectively an immortal now. Erm... Congratulations?"