Fast Track to Paradise

They said I was lucky to only ingest a small piece of that rotten potato. A bit more and I would be history. They also urged me to be more careful with my food choices and to remember about my classy family pedigree.

Obviously, I felt ashamed, but this vegetable smelled so enticing that it rendered me mentally incapacitated.

So, the next morning when I spotted its remnants on the ground, I happily sank my teeth into the dark, half-decomposed mushy flesh and slurped the whole thing at once.

They say all dogs go to heaven. Hope they're right.