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The Naked Beat

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"This isn't a joke, Harrigan. A girl's missing. I'm trying to find her."

He exhaled, "I thought you gave up being a private dick. Aren't you running a coffee house for juvenile delinquents?"

"Among other things. I'm just trying to help out a man whose daughter ran away."

"Did he report it to the police?"

"She's 18. He's just trying to find her."

"What do you want from me, Jake?"

"I just need to know where Jade Chen's place is located."

The line suddenly became a ghost town. I swear I heard the wind blowing a piece of sagebrush by...

5 comments add one below

  • avatar

    Christopher almost 8 years ago

    I made a conscious effort to limit the similes and metaphors in the new story until Jake started slipping back into his old life. I wanted the Jake at the beginning of the story to be a different man than in the previous story. I wanted the passage of time to have had a real effect on him. But, once he realized he'd gone beyond the point of no return, I wanted the old Jake to surface again. You'll have to be the judge of whether or not I achieved that goal.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt almost 8 years ago

    Thanks for that, Christopher. Yes, Jake's hardening up now, back to his moody, testy self. I feel the ghostliness of the ghost town!

  • avatar

    Christopher almost 8 years ago

    Thanks, Neville.

  • avatar

    D.M. almost 8 years ago

    always enjoy a writer's insights

  • avatar

    Christopher almost 8 years ago

    Thanks, D.M. I like to clarify things now and then.

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