The Parrot

My luck is terrible. I just bought a parrot and he has a speech impediment. You can't understand a damn word he says. Come to think of it, his name is Sergei. I bet that feathery little bastard is Russian. I knew ten bucks was too good a deal for a talking bird. I wondered what a parrot would be doing wearing an ushanka hat. If I go home and he's reciting the Communist Manifesto, I swear before all that is holy I'm going to toss his commie ass in the microwave! Let's just see how you like that, comrade!