"Sleeping Beauty - version" drabbles by Neville Hunt
Sleeping Beauty - Version 4
Sleeping Beauty - version #4
You know the story. Beautiful princess, evil fairy, curse, spinning wheel, ouch!, slept 100 years.
Fast forward. Castle overgrown; prince plus entourage arrives.
Hero fights through foliage, sees castle, breaks in, courtiers asleep, enters the princess's bedroom and sees her asleep. He kisses her cheeks flamboyantly.
‘Mwahhh! - Mwahhh!’
Princess wakes, stretches, yawns, looks up at the handsome prince.
“Oh my! Show me what you’ve got, big boy!”
The prince replied... “My dear... you misunderstand. You’re so beautiful, so glamorous. I just want to gaze at you. And can I try on your pretty dress?”
Well... it is a fairy story.
Sleeping Beauty - Version 3
Sleeping Beauty - version #3
You know the story. Beautiful princess, evil fairy, curse, spinning wheel, ouch!, sleep for 100 years.
Fast forward. Castle overgrown; prince plus entourage arrives.
Hero fights through foliage, sees castle, illegally breaks in and beholds courtiers asleep. Like a predator he enters the princess's bedroom and spies the beauty on her bed asleep. He kisses her.
Princess wakes, screams, accuses prince of assault, but calms down when he hands over a wad of cash, quickly followed by a non-disclosure agreement, which she signs. Prince plus entourage goes off in search of other beauties.
Has he woken you? Me too.
Sleeping Beauty - version 2
Sleeping Beauty - version #2
You know the story. Beautiful princess, evil fairy, curse, spinning wheel, ouch!, sleep for 100 years.
Fast forward. Castle overgrown; handsome prince plus entourage.
Hero fights through foliage, spies castle, illegally breaks in and beholds courtiers asleep. Like a predator he enters the princess's bedroom and spies the beauty on her bed asleep. He kisses her.
Now being a 21st century woman, she’s having none of that. Her hand shoots into her purse and grabs a canister and Prince Charming gets a faceful of mace. Mail order from Amazon - you didn’t really think she slept for 100 years did you?
Sleeping Beauty - version 1
Sleeping Beauty - version #1
You know the story. Beautiful princess, evil fairy, curse, spinning wheel, ouch!, sleep for 100 years.
Fast forward. Castle overgrown, almost impenetrable. Handsome prince arrives with entourage.
Hero fights through the foliage, spies the castle, illegally breaks in and beholds courtiers asleep. Like a predator he enters the princess's bedroom and spies the beauty on her bed asleep. He kisses her.
Now that’s far enough!
Who says all princes are handsome? Beauties can’t be that picky after 100 years can they? She half opens one eye, looks at the prince, closes it again, thinking ‘I’m good for another 100 years!’
