“And that’s a violation of your civil rights,” the lawyer said. “Everyone has the right to due process. Even you. You were denied that right. I propose you sue Almighty God, starting with wrongful dismissal.”
The Devil looked around again, “This has got to be a joke!”
“It’s no joke. Will you just trust me?” he said as he put his hand out.
The Devil grabbed his hand and shook it. Smoke billowed up from their clasped hands. Then the lawyer keeled over and fell off the wall, dead.
The Devil shrugged, “Damn it! I lose more lawyers that way!”
The Devil smirked, “Congratulations. That supposed to mean something to me?”
“Yes,” the lawyer replied. “I want to represent you.”
The Devil let out a sinister laugh. “Represent me? In what capacity?”
“In a lawsuit against God,” he said with no trace of jest.
The Devil looked around, “Is this a prank? Am I on Candid Camera?”
“Not at all. Let me ask you something, when God cast you down from Heaven did you get a fair trial?”
The Devil raised an eyebrow, “Now that you mention it, no. He just chucked me and my friends out without a warning.”
The Devil sat on a small brick wall fence outside of a church. A stranger walked by and asked, “Are you Lucifer?”
The Devil nodded.
The man sat down on the wall next to him. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”
The Devil cocked his head sideways, “Why?”
The man pulled a card from his coat and handed it to the Devil, who read it. Then the card burst into flames between his thumb and forefinger.
“So you’re a lawyer?” the Devil asked.
The man nodded. “I’m the best in the business. A thousand cases and I’ve never lost.”