Feel the Benefit

"Dad? I want you and Mum to split up."
"That's crazy! Why?"
"Because I'm the only kid in my class with married parents, that's why."
"I didn't know that, Josh."
"Jimee's mum has nine kids to seven different fathers, what a great role model she is, you can smell the kudos."
"Hmm."
"And for God's sake get some tattoos and piercings. My mates think you and Mum are freaks."
"Pfft!"
"Seriously, Dad, you don't know how tough it is being the odd one out. I just want to live the benefits dream like all the other kids in my class."