Hard Labour

"Good news, Mrs Parminter, baby's head is showing!" said the obstetrician.
Twenty one hours of labour and Mrs Parminter was exhausted.
"Forceps delivery is out so I'll be putting both of my hands up your chuff and pulling like hell."
Mrs Parminter was at the stage where she didn't give a toss if a coach full of sightseers pulled up for a guided tour of her chuff. "Do whatever it takes," she replied.
"Baby is stuck tight."
"I can't take anymore."
"Desperate situations call for desperate measures. Nurse, here are my car keys, you'll find a crowbar in the boot."