I scream

Keen to get out of a boring trek to Granny’s, Little Red Riding Hood argued, “Shouldn’t you go to see Granny yourself as she’s your mum after all?”

Gertie wanted to stay at home and play with her dolls, with her cloak inside out.

“I couldn’t possibly go and leave you in the house all alone.” declared her mother. Little Red Riding Hood wasn’t smart enough to understand the irony of this assertion.

Gertie stamped her feet, screamed, cried crocodile tears, and then asked, “Can I have an ice cream then, to make the long journey through the wood tolerable?”