nevillehunt avatar

Wards and Warders #2

by

Word must’ve got out about me walking back the quarter mile between the X-Ray Department and the acute stroke ward, because I was bored waiting for a porter.

“I needed a walk!”

I was bollocked on my return by the nurses. So they’re moving me on, ‘after administering my drugs.’

“But I don’t do no drugs!”

They couldn’t believe their ears. They didn’t believe me!

“But Neville, here in hospital everyone does drugs!”

I’m going where the air is rare, because however cute I might be, I’m no longer acute. I’m going upstairs (I hope that’s not a euphemism!)

16 comments add one below

  • avatar

    Jeff Taylor 3 months ago

    Hopefully it's only the patients on drugs. But the British government has just made me a class C drug user because of my meds, so who am I to complain?? 😉

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    Hey Jeff. Class C eh? Sounds like you must be a real cool dude!

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    😎

  • avatar

    Jeff Taylor 3 months ago

    Er… Nope. Coolness is way over there on the horizon. I sometimes wave as it goes past. 😊

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    LOL 😁

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 3 months ago

    ("I’m going where the air is rare" sounds like it should be a song lyric). No keeping a good man down though, eh?

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    Thanks Drew. I think the inspiration for that line did come from a song, but I can’t remember which one... so I’ll claim it as a Nev original!

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 3 months ago

    Good for you!

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    Btw, haven’t read anything from Christopher recently. Hope he’s OK 🤞

  • avatar

    Jamie Clapperton 3 months ago

    Speaking as a Porter who tends to err on the side of paranoia, I think it quite right that you were bollocked. 😉

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 3 months ago

    Yes, you tell him straight, Jamie!
    I hope Christopher's ok, too, he has been a bit quiet recently.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    I take my bollocking like a man! In fact now that’s four or five actual bollockings I’ve had; the nurses, Jamie, Drew, Mrs H and a mate of mine who tells me to take it all more seriously. But I did need a walk. All the bedandchairboundness was starting to bung me up (sorry to be indelicate guys). The walk solved the problem.

  • avatar

    Jamie Clapperton 3 months ago

    😁 😢 😁 😢 😁 emoticons representing real reaction my neighbours will have heard!

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 3 months ago

    Can't beat a good walk for getting the orifices functioning. Or am I talking shit?

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 3 months ago

    Haha! You don’t usually Drew, but you certainly were then! 🤧😷

  • avatar

    Christopher 2 months ago

    Thanks for the concern, guys. I'm still around, just been extremely busy with my own recuperation from last year's surgeries and now having a family member that's not well and having to take dialysis three days a week.

    Neville, you may have been channeling your inner Frank Sinatra. I think in "Come Fly With Me" he says "Once I get you up there where the air is rarefied."

    But I doubt Ol' Blue Eyes would make a fuss.

Join the conversation

Sign up or Sign in to leave a comment on this drabble.