nevillehunt avatar

Happy being crappy #1

by

Now here’s the thing. I have recently taken up a rough approximation to golf. The resemblance is based upon using clubs, golf balls and a nine-hole course nearby. I had last played about 25 years ago. And I was crap then. And I’m crap now.

Mrs H was speaking to a friend recently and, under interrogation, she admitted that I had taken up golf. A keen and competitive golfer, Sarah asked if I was taking lessons.

“No!” replied Mrs H, “his mates are teaching him.”

“Well he’ll never be any good then!” exclaimed Sarah.

But Sarah couldn’t understand me...

11 comments add one below

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    I called her Sarah to protect the innocent... and because it’s her name.

  • avatar

    Christopher 7 days ago

    Haha. I'm no good at golf. My swing looks like I'm chopping wood. And anyway, I'm more like Rodney Dangerfield on a golf course than Ted Knight (much to the chagrin of the other posh golfers around me). If you ever hear some idiot on the course yelling out lines from "Caddyshack," look around because it's probably me!

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 7 days ago

    Haha love the drabble and your comment Neville. I'm with you guys, except I've only ever attempted it once. And while it was nice to have a walk in the park (even in the drizzle) nothing else appealed to me. I'm very uncompetitive with sport, apart from football :)

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    Now then Drew. Do I know which team you support I wonder? [interrogates memory] No, I don’t think I do! I’m a very part time supporter of City... Norwich City of course... but if offered the chance of a pint in my local instead of watching the footy, then my interest in City wanes....

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 7 days ago

    Yes, the call of the Pint is very strong, whatever the situation :)
    I'm a Chelsea fan. And like a lot of Chelsea fans I have to point out that I've been one since before the Roman era - 1967 in fact - so I've seen some awesome Chelsea sides but I've also seen some incredibly bad ones. My family might say I'm obssessive about Chelsea. They could be right.
    (I've also got a soft spot for Newport County).

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    Does that last reveal suggest a Welsh connection/heritage?

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    Chelsea?... I can’t help guessing that your neck of the woods might be west or south west London, ‘cos no-one from the east would dare support anyone else other than West Ham, or, if really brave, Millwall.

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 7 days ago

    Ooh West Ham and Millwall, scary places...!! When I lived in east London (Leyton then Walthamstow) I'd go on the tube to Chelsea matches wearing my Chelsea scarf. Not my most intelligent life-choices. However, somehow I escaped unscathed and generally avoided any problems.
    A friend was a West Ham season ticket holder and we'd go to Upton Park often. Despite the bad press Hammers fans had at the time I always found them friendly, even when I said who I support.
    Millwall on the other hand... :(

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    Hear, hear re Millwall. The most scary supporters I ever had the misfortune to come across at Carrow Road. On the other hand, I was once physically lifted up by my lapels by a Leicester supporter who was standing next to me. Leicester were one-nil up with 5 minutes to the whistle. Naively, I shouted, “Come you on Ci’ee, you can still do it!” His message to the me hanging in front of him was “Says ooo?” in his best Leicester accent. We lost, so I survived! Phew!!

  • avatar

    Drew Martyn 7 days ago

    Haha the rich tapestry of terrace life!!
    After a Chelsea 4 Liverpool 2 match I was headed to a friends flat near Kings Cross wearing full Chelsea regalia. Turned a corner, walked straight into a group of 30+ Liverpool fans heading for the train home. I was dead!
    All I could do was pretend to be hard and walk straight through the middle of them. Luckily, they didnt know I was bricking it, and all I got was a couple of passing elbows and evil looks. I somehow convinced them I was a typical Chelsea thug! I'm a lover not a fighter, so that was probably my best acting role. Saved my life though lol.

  • avatar

    Neville Hunt 7 days ago

    Scary!!! I would have crapped meself good and proper!

Join the conversation

Sign up or Sign in to leave a comment on this drabble.