Pressed for comment

With the mess at the undertakers and the forced gate and doors, the night's macabre activities were quickly in the public domain.

The Goss, who were funding Marcus's refrigeration, capitalised on it:

The Goss headline read: 'HE-WRECKED'

'Even in death, Marcus Branthwaite is victim of a cowardly act of theft. A perverted sneak-thief has stolen the memory of his manhood.

Why, asks The Goss? Was this revenge? If so, revenge for what? Call our action line below if you hear of anyone bragging about his erection and tell us 'wiener who it is!'

The Goss gives a toss!'