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The ingredients were a fidgety young woman, a randy young artist, a gypsy encampment with a saucy Carmenlike vamp and a couple of live pigeons. That was tonight's night out. The composer?... never heard of him!

I wouldn't choose such an apparent joke of a performance were it not beamed to a cinema near me. But it was wonderful.

Ballerinas in colourful dresses mimicked fat feathered friends a-strutting across the stage. Comedy turned into pathos as the fidgeter clawed the floor in anguish as her beau was tempted astray.

Happy ever after though when errant beau reclaimed his perch.

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