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My resolution is not to swear. As a writer, I ought to know better. It’s often said that swearing just shows a lack of vocabulary but that’s just not the… er, case. However, swearing has been scientifically shown to reduce pain, but that’s not going to make me break my resolution. Next time I scald myself on kettle steam, I’ll just quietly say, “Oh flip, what a kerfuffle,” and all will be well. As a writer, I maintain that swearing has its place in fiction but if you can’t manage 100 words without… oh shit, I’ve only seven words left.

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