My Not Very Good Perfect Day

Clear blue skies, a stiff breeze to fill the sails and a heavily-laden ship directly ahead. What more could a pirate captain ask for?

“Look lively,” I yelled to my murderous crew.

Hiding our weapons, we practised our welcoming smiles.

“Ahoy,” I cried to the boat’s finely-dressed captain. “Where ye headed?”

While the captain prattled on about the fine weather, my coin-hungry crew leapt aboard, me too.

“We’re bound for the watery depths,” the captain finally answered my initial question.

Ah, not heavily-laden at all – sinking.

Blithering lobster pots! So much for a perfect day.