Three weeks. It's taken this long so that the element of surprise was on side. Steve shaved my eyebrows which resulted in the bird i was seeing ending it.
'' Sandwich mate?'' I ask him.
I go through, get out a razor, and shave my pubes. Adding it generously to the tuna sandwich.
''There you go mate'' i say, trying to hide the creeping grin.
He takes a bite.
''What the fuck, I'm allergic to seafood!'' he shouts, before collapsing to the ground, his face going bright red.
Shit i thought.
''Sorry mate, i forgot i had crabs''